i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Randomize
