you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
