I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
