Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize