Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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