Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
