I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
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