There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
There's always time for handjobs
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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