I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
