I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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