I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
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