YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
