nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
