she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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