Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize