just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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