Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Randomize
