Can Purell be used as lube?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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