My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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