Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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