I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
