My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize