:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
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I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
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