I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
This baby is an asshole
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize
