So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
