i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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