Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
