some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
