So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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