so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
