Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
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he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
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IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.