Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....