Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
