Whoa Z and x make the same sound
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
