you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
