Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize