come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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