Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
