There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
