he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Damn victory sex feels great
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