Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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