So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
