I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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