the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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