i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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