well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Just cropdusted the office
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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