Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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