its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
