Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize