i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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