It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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