What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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