I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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